“Most assuredly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it produces much grain. He who loves his life will lose it, and he who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. If anyone serves Me, let him follow Me; and where I am, there My servant will be also. If anyone serves Me, him My Father will honor.” (John 12:24-26)
Can I be honest? Really, truly, not-about-to-give-the-“Christian”-response honest?
I don’t like this verse. I don’t. There is a part of me that cringes and begins to mourn all the things I will have to give up in order to follow Jesus. In order to see my life “produce much grain.”
If you ask me what I’ll have to give up, I couldn’t rattle off a list. I don’t know exactly. But I do know that if I’m to follow Jesus I won’t always get what I want.
I know following Jesus means humility and patience and sacrifice. All the things my flesh hates.
But if I take a breath…
If I take a moment to confess what I am truly feeling to my Father…
Then I remember.
I remember that Jesus is who I truly want. My spirit wants Him more than anything this world offers.
When I come to Him and cling to Him…
I find peace.
I find rest.
I find soul satisfaction.
Yes, being in an intimate, mind blowing relationship with my Savior is painful to my flesh. But it is also so soothing to my soul.
And every uncomfortable, painful, or disappointing thing my flesh must endure is worth an eternal life time with Jesus.
For to me, to live is Christ, and to die is gain. (Philippians 1:21)
This post was written why reading Quietly Through the Bible. Have you been following the Quietly Through reading plan? What has God laid on your heart this week as you spend time in His word? Please share in the comments or send me a message. I’d love to hear from you.
Only by grace,